The boring and insane life.

Ask me anything   Being witty is hard.

cumaddict72:

guccier:

nice url did ur mom pick it out for u

yes

(via edgyblogname)

— 1 month ago with 611497 notes

savannahblair:

i hate when people ask “who you tryna look good for?!” bitch myself bye

(via milesjai)

— 1 month ago with 656255 notes

toastoat:

ill draw girls with eyebrows so strong they could kill 10 men

(Source: toastoat, via owlmylove)

— 1 month ago with 41208 notes

spookyshire:

harryhickey:

MOZZARELLA STICKS ARE GROSS

image

(via trust)

— 1 month ago with 487499 notes

bombing:

fruitlooooped:

Today at work we were evacuated because the Bed, Bath, and Beyond next to us got a bomb threat.

My question is: Who bombs a Bed, Bath, and Beyond?  Who has something against great prices, linens, and middle aged women?

this is the best thing that’s ever been in my tag

(via owlmylove)

— 1 month ago with 9674 notes

notsosilentwallflower:

shampooonalasso:

tragicvillain:

image

in the name of

image

Finger me in the name of cardiology.

that works too

(Source: thecrimsonalchemist, via trust)

— 1 month ago with 372657 notes

raptorific:

I see how it is. Rihanna can wear a shiny, completely transparent dress in public and everyone loves it, but when I did it, I was “wasting saran wrap” and “ruining Easter, Daniel.”

(via panic-at-the-dildos)

— 1 month ago with 294973 notes
inhuemane:

barack-o-llamas:

well would ya look at that

THIS IS MY FAVORITE PICTURE ON THE INTERNET

inhuemane:

barack-o-llamas:

well would ya look at that

THIS IS MY FAVORITE PICTURE ON THE INTERNET

(Source: linsaypinsay, via awkwardvagina)

— 1 month ago with 588595 notes
sunshine-and-sparkles:

chevy-raised-jack-daniels-fed:

merrymaudlin:

mercurykiss:

thugburrito:

My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%

NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORYSo a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.

I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..

What’s next pizza delivery hitmen

My story doesnt have to do with my pizza guy buying me something but he was adorable none the less.
I had a bad day at school, and my mom and step dad were out to a gymnastics things for my younger sister so I was home alone. I was upset and talking to a friend online and told her she had to come over ‘cuz I had a bad day. So she came over and we decided to get pizza. So i ordered some online and told her to pay for it with her card and ‘d pay her back in cash (because the pizza place near my house has a rule if you order online you have to pay by card) (stupid, i know)
so I walked away and she aparently put in the special request thing ‘send your cutest driver, ask for chelsea, sing her a song and give her a hug. she had a bad day :(‘
(i wanted to kill her after I found out)
well I didn’t know at the time, so when the dude got there I answered the door and he was like ‘delivery for chelsea’ and i was like yeah hi thats me gimme ma pizza
THIS FUCKER
CAME IN
PUT MY PIZZA ON THE KITCHEN TABLE
HUGGED ME
AND SANG ‘EVERYTHING IS GONNA BE ALRIGHT’
i blushed so bad and he smiled and left
after we ate the pizza i found out he wrote his number on the box too, s that was interesting. My friend gave him a 20$ tip so yeah fun night 

sunshine-and-sparkles:

chevy-raised-jack-daniels-fed:

merrymaudlin:

mercurykiss:

thugburrito:

My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%

NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORY
So a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.

It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.

An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.

So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.

My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.

I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..

What’s next pizza delivery hitmen

My story doesnt have to do with my pizza guy buying me something but he was adorable none the less.

I had a bad day at school, and my mom and step dad were out to a gymnastics things for my younger sister so I was home alone. I was upset and talking to a friend online and told her she had to come over ‘cuz I had a bad day. So she came over and we decided to get pizza. So i ordered some online and told her to pay for it with her card and ‘d pay her back in cash (because the pizza place near my house has a rule if you order online you have to pay by card) (stupid, i know)

so I walked away and she aparently put in the special request thing ‘send your cutest driver, ask for chelsea, sing her a song and give her a hug. she had a bad day :(‘

(i wanted to kill her after I found out)

well I didn’t know at the time, so when the dude got there I answered the door and he was like ‘delivery for chelsea’ and i was like yeah hi thats me gimme ma pizza

THIS FUCKER

CAME IN

PUT MY PIZZA ON THE KITCHEN TABLE

HUGGED ME

AND SANG ‘EVERYTHING IS GONNA BE ALRIGHT’

i blushed so bad and he smiled and left

after we ate the pizza i found out he wrote his number on the box too, s that was interesting. My friend gave him a 20$ tip so yeah fun night 

(via chelseabrookex3)

— 1 month ago with 441034 notes
awwww-cute:

Let him out, came out a minute later to check on him

awwww-cute:

Let him out, came out a minute later to check on him

(via dshanoum2646)

— 1 month ago with 192678 notes